Thursday, January 06, 2011

Expectations

(This is for a "Madhouse" entry. Sorry, Kate, I'll probably continue to be hit or miss on it.)

Exoectations? Whew. I've had a few!

As a very little girl, I thought I'd be a ballerina. Nope, didn't happen...though I did eventually become a decent (social) swing dancer.

In my late teens and early 20s it was opera. To that end I studied voice for ten years...scrimped and saved and bartered for voice lessons, scraped by on "no money" and finally gave it up because though my voice is actually pretty good, my technique and self discipline were not.

In general as a child and young woman I didn't have set expectations about my personal life as an adult, perhaps because I came from a small family without lots of "examples" to see.

I didn't expect to be divorced. Or re-married. I am, it's working, but is work. (That's something you don't generally expect as a child!)

I certainly did not expect to be staying at home (albeit because I am presently unemployed)...and most especially did not expect to like it. Liking it still makes me feel rather guilty (lapsed Catholic and feminist that I am).

Most of all, I did not expect to be good at it, nor so very domestic. What did I do yesterday? All day? I mended, cleaned, and ironed.

Cooking and baking? Yes, the expecation of enjoying that and being good at it was the one thing now occupying me that is not a surprise.

Life is full of expectations...and life goes on in spite of them!

2 comments:

sapphireblue said...

This is true. You never fathom a divorce.

J. Kwiatkowski said...

I find that if I break my life into seven year increments, I can see how entirely I've changed from the beginning of the span to the end. I'm hoping this seven year hitch ends with me having more fiscal abundance, that would be a novelty!